Cross your T's and dot your I's. And O's. And E's.

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Local newscasters are the worst. Whenever there's a name or word that originated in Spanish, they bust out their Spanish accent for that word only. It drives me nuts.

But that's probably because I can't roll my r's.
I'm so guilty of saying "sawk-AY" instead of "sawk-ee" (Sake). But I can't get around it - the former makes me feel pretentious; the latter, stupid. Although I guess pretension is just a flashier form of stupidity?
Sorry to throw cold water on your dream of sticking it to the fuss-budgets at New Yorker, but...it's not an umlaut. It's called a diaeresis. See this link:
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/diaeresis
it means the vowel is pronounced by itself, like in coördinated, Zoë, Brontë. It's not required, obviously. See Dante, no one spells it Dantë, probably because it's Italian.
My Cygan would be so disapointed in you. Remember the kid in 10th grade who had the report on the vikings, oh I mean "veekings"? Or what about the poor students in the first row who forgot to wear their shamu ponchos when she talked about "scootlund".
You're fighting a losing battle mate. Even 15 years ago Americans would give me very strange looks for pronouncing "Nicaragua" with five syllables, or sounding the "t" in "fillet" and "valet".

Of course the fact that upstate-new-yorkers get their pronunciation of "Copenhagen" from Danny Kaye has its own perverse amusement value.

Brash Lion, actually it's pronounced "sah-keh." The "-ay" sound is a dipthong, and would be written in English as "-ei" rather than just "-e." It may not seem like much, but to the Japanese, it would be an entirely different word.

Also, there's a difference between a word in a foreign language that we use in English because we don't have our own word (sake) and a word that has changed form when borrowed by the English language and therefore become our own (Copenhagen, borrowed from German).

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Rottin' in Denmark

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Rottin' in Denmark
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It's not my fault your mother has abandoned her principles.

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