A gringo's got my baby

This is one of those things you only see in Denmark.

They see me strollin'. They hatin'.

Strollers. Full of babies. Outside of cafes and kiosks. While the parents pop in for coffee or milk or UV rays. This is a common enough sight here that I don't even really see them anymore. The only reason I noticed these the other day was that I heard two babies having a cry-off on a street with no visible adults. I walked past and thought about switching them, but figured that was a little too troll, even for a Wednesday.

Denmark Rookies always use shit like this to pedal the downhill momentum of their 'everyone trusts each other here!' preconceptions. But when you think about it, who would steal a baby anyway? Every single person I know in this city has had their bike stolen, but bikes don't have to be fed and bediapered every six minutes. You can't take a baby into a pawn shop and be Tuborging before noon. Also, as I learned last week, babies are watery and difficult to carry. The whole thing seems like far more trouble than it's worth.

If you really want to see this as a metaphor, notice that the strollers are often locked outside the cafes and kiosks with bike chains, though the babies are unfettered. Realistically, it's a lot smarter and easier to just steal the $500 stroller than it is to deal with screaming, brown-and-yellow-dripping contraband. If anything sums up Danish pragmatism, it's the locks on the strollers, not the location.